My Halo Sits on My Horns

Highlights of the day: A woman artist showed up to help me with a ladder! A very light ladder. One we could both lift. The lights are up!

Also, this lady who came into my studio during the Biannual said something really cool. We were talking about my self-portrait as a cow and she said: “My halo sits on my horns.” I really loved that!

Overall the Biannual was well-attended. There were lots of people in our brand new building at 1907 Sabine Street. We officially exist! We’re on the map, part of Sawyer Yards, and people know about us.

That was the good. The bad was that I carried a lot of sadness with me throughout the day. The full moon is upon us, and I know it’s affecting me, but there are multiple layers to this sadness, and in the end I think it comes down to feeling alone and lonely. Today was a big day for me, but it was very much (aside from the amazing helpful gesture of the young woman who brought me the ladder) a solo production. I tried to remind myself that worse than doing art events all by my lonesome is doing them with people who cause drama, make demands on me while I’m working, or otherwise cramp my style.

There must be, I keep hoping, other kinds of people out there. People who are reliable and helpful. Perhaps I just haven’t met them yet. And perhaps the unexpected helpful gesture of the ladder is the Universe trying to remind me they’re out there and I shouldn’t give up hope.

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